A Quick Hint Update

I'd made mention of this on Twitter a few days back, but I realize not everyone is on Twitter, and if they are, they aren't necessarily following me, so here's the skinny: The maybe pile has been weaned down even more. Out of the initial 276 stories, I have pulled out 45 "definites" and put 111 in what I'm calling the "maybe-maybe" pile.

Now it's just a matter of picking and choosing about half of those 111 stories, which I must say is going to be very hard, as they're all so great.

So ... that's it for now. In the next day or so I plan to have another mini-contest in celebration of a story being published in a magazine that was thought to be dead. Stay tuned.

VIPs On vsf

Laura Ellen Scott has launched a new blog "collecting very short thoughts about very short fiction ... Written mainly for students/newer writers, but not necessarily." It's called VIPs on vsf and hosts a very short piece by me about Hint Fiction. But if you're familiar with me and this blog, you don't want to waste your time, so check out the rest of the site for a slew of great writers, including Scott Garson, Roxane Gay (who loves to be called Roxanne), David Erlewine, Gabriel Orgrease, Erin Fitzgerald, Joseph Young, Ryan Bradley, and Ethel Rohan. More, no doubt, will be added soon.

Writer-Readers Vs. Reader-Readers

As Dan Brown's waaaaay overdue rip-snorter hits stores today, I thought it would be as good a time as any to talk about the different kind of readers there are in the world. Obviously there are a lot of different kind of readers in the world, but for our purposes here let's just separate them into two categories: writer-readers and reader-readers.

First let me tell you a story about a sixteen-year-old boy who had his very first short story accepted. As you can imagine, he was thrilled. Every time he went to the bookstore, he looked in the magazine section for the particular magazine that had accepted his story. When he visited family in New York, he checked out those bookstores too, looking for that particular magazine. He was so optimistic and naive to think that this magazine that had just accepted his story would be the kind of magazine that was available in just about every bookstore across the country.

Does this story have a happy ending?

Well, that depends on your point of view. What happened was the particular magazine eventually folded, as many particular magazines do. Later though this boy learned that wasn't such a terrible thing, as the particular magazine in question was the kind put together on a desktop computer, printed out, folded, side-stapled, and then forced to be called a magazine with very little readership (like a dozen people).

Not that there's necessarily anything wrong with that, of course. We all can't have our first acceptances be to The New Yorker.

But was that boy upset? Yes and no. He understood how things went. But he also thought it was a shame. Because had that story been published, a lot of people were going see his story in print!

For those of you playing catch up, that young boy was me. Now here I am, almost 28, growing more and more cynical by the minute. I want to believe in a world where, if I publish a story, a lot of people will read it, and if they don't, they will at least know of its existence.

Unfortunately, that's not the case.

The majority of people that read my work are -- surprise, surprise -- other writers. Is there anything wrong with that? Of course not. But I think sometimes as writers, especially starting out, we fool ourselves into thinking that once we publish a story or poem or book, everyone is going to know about it and read it and love it.

Stop a random person on the street and ask them if they know who Dan Brown is. Most likely, they're going to tell you yes. The same with Stephen King, James Patterson, Nora Roberts, etc.

Then ask if they know who T.C. Boyle is, or E.L. Doctorow, or Joyce Carol Oates, or Stewart O'Nan. Some might say, yeah, sure, sounds familiar, but they might be hard-pressed to give you specific titles.

These, ladies and gentlemen, are your reader-readers.

If it wasn't for Revolutionary Road being made into a movie, hardly anybody would know the name Richard Yates anymore. But reader-readers are now familiar with the name, just as writer-readers have been familiar with the name for years.

What's my point here? Well, I'm not really sure. But I think it's important for writers to at least acknowledge there are different types of readers.

Right now I'm working on a new novel. It's very commercial, a straight-up thriller, and there are times when I find myself agonizing over a certain scene or even sentence, wanting to get the writing just right. Then I remember that with a thriller, the writing isn't so much important as is the pace and plot. Not that I shouldn't make sure the writing is as best it can be, but go to any bookstore, page through a half dozen thrillers, what are you most likely going to see? The writing will no doubt be good if not at least decent, but I highly doubt it will be the quality of writing you'd get from reading, say, Middlesex.

Ultimately as writers we are writing for ourselves. We have stories inside that we want -- need -- to get out. But we'd be lying to ourselves if we said we didn't care what other people thought. That's why we submit our work, after all, because we want to be accepted, want to be read.

That's why I think the short story is the purest form of storytelling. It has a specific purpose, which is simply to be told. Unlike writing a book, where you have to take into account your readership (again, the reader-reader aspect: who will this book appeal to?), where marketing and accounting departments have just as much at stake as the editor, a story is what it is. It doesn't worry about its readership. It just worries about being told, and being told well. Don't get me wrong, books can be beautiful things as well (I've read my fair share), but a story ... it's a different kind of animal.

Anyway, getting back to the whole writer-reader vs. reader-reader thing, writer-readers are the ones most apt to read short stories, both online and in print. Why? Because most often the people reading those online and print magazines are writers who want to place their work there. Not many reader-readers care about a little zine that's printed on someone's computer and only has 20 copies. That's not to say that little zine doesn't have value, of course (see how I'm trying to cover my ass here with every point?), but in terms of your average, every day reader who has already gotten themselves Dan Brown's latest, that little zine doesn't even come close to their radar (as neither does The Paris Review or Glimmer Train).

It's kind of depressing, when you think about it. That all our hard work and energy gets put into these stories, and then we submit those stories, and then, luckily, those stories get accepted and then published ... and only a handful of people actually read them.

It's better to remain naive, I think, to believe that everyone is going to see our work than to accept the fact that, well, pretty much nobody will.

But that shouldn't matter. Because we're writers, and we write because we have no choice. It's simply in our nature to write. The being accepted, seeing our work in print or online, that's great. And if people (reader-readers) come across our work and actually read it? Well, that's nice too.

P.S. As an aside, there is actually a third type of reader: the non-reader. Like this douche bag who is "a proud non-reader of books":

Anthology Update & What Is A Professional Writer?

Thanks all for leaving comments and e-mailing me about Augusto Monterroso's estate. I'm happy to say I've gotten in contact with them and it's looking like there's a very good chance I'll be able to include his story in the anthology. Tuesday night I did a read-through of the stories in the maybe pile. Out of the 276 stories, I check marked 149. What does this mean exactly? Well, those 149 stories were what stuck out to me at that moment. Because these stories are so short and rely so much on my participation as a reader (i.e., a lot of imagination), my mood at the time (even the weather) can sway my opinion on any particular story. So I'm setting those stories aside and next week will read through the 276 stories again. I know the suspense is killing some of you, and I apologize for that, but I hope you understand the amount of time and thought I need to put into these stories. If this were a magazine with multiple issues, I probably could have made my decisions by now and sent out responses. But obviously in terms of this anthology -- most likely a once and done thing -- I have to be extremely selective.

Finally, I am curious to know what you think makes a professional writer. A couple posts back in the comments section there had been a mention of novice and professional writers, and I had said for argument sake let's assume a professional writer is someone who makes their living completely off their writing, with no other source of income. Daniel Olivas then mentioned how he didn't quite agree with that statement, saying he doesn't think many "professional" writers write full-time.

He's right, of course. As Joe Konrath once put it, more people play in the NFL than there are people who write full-time.

No two writers are alike. Michael Connelly published four novels before he quit working as a crime reporter and went to write full-time. T.C. Boyle regularly publishes stories in The New Yorker and Playboy and has a book coming out almost every year, many bestsellers, but still he teaches writing at the University of Southern California where he's been since 1978. My buddy Joe Schreiber, who has two novels coming out next month (one a Star Wars novel, another an original horror novel), works full-time as an MRI tech. He's married, has kids, but still manages to find time to write. When I asked him once if he ever thought he'd get to a point where he could write full-time, he said he'd be happy to get to a point where he could cut back to part-time work and spend the rest writing.

Again, no two writers are alike, but despite all those differences, I consider all three of those gentlemen professional writers.

There is no definitive answer on this topic. Just like everyone has their own definition of what lazy means, everyone has their own definition of what professional means. I will say that I think many people base whether or not someone is a "professional" in terms of success. If a writer has a bestseller or wins a lot of awards, they can easily be considered a professional writer (even if that writer still has a day job). Then there are other writers who aren't very well known, who have never won an award, yet they somehow manage to make enough money to stay afloat writing full-time. Would they, then, be considered a professional writer?

This is why I'm curious to see what other people think. And this doesn't even have to apply to writers. Like, what makes a professional musician? Somebody who's signed by a major record label and whose songs are played nonstop on the radio? They make their living off their art, sure, but so do some people in cover bands that play local bars. Not a lot of people, but a few, and if both types make their living off their music ... well, I'm sure you see just how slippery this slope really is.

It's also worth noting that there are "professional writers" who are arrogant assholes that act very unprofessional most of the time. Yet they continue to be successful in the amount of books they sell, the awards they win, etc.

And then you have the novice writer who has been trying to sell a novel for years and hasn't managed it yet, and despite how frustrating it is, how it looks like it will never happen, they manage to maintain a level of professionalism in every aspect of their writing.

I could keep throwing out examples but I think I'll open it up to you. Again, there's no right or wrong answer, but still I'm curious to see what you have to say.

Augusto Monterroso

This is a long shot, I know, but would anyone have any idea on how to get in contact with Augusto Monterroso's estate? Among other things, he's noted for writing (at the time) the shortest short story ever called "The Dinosaur." Months ago I tried contacting Ediciones ERA, the publisher who most recently released his story collection Obras Completas (y otros cuentos) -- e-mailed them first in English (didn't hear anything) and then in Spanish (a friend helped translate) and still never heard anything. I'd really like to include his story in the anthology, and while anybody can simply find the story pretty much anywhere online, to print it I of course need permission, and I can only get that from his estate. On the off-chance anybody has information, please e-mail me at robert (at) robertswartwood (dot) com. Thanks!